04
Wed, Dec

Cluster F**K

ERIC PREVEN'S NOTEBOOK

ERIC PREVEN’S NOTEBOOK - Join me in demanding that Los Angeles be awarded more Michelin stars.  We practically invented gridlock and automobile pollution! 

How many Michelin stars does Miami have?  

I am aware of a restaurant called Caruso's in Santa Barbara that got a Michelin star.  

I suggest that we convene a task force at a Local Caruso mall to discuss rebuilding Los Angeles' foodie status.  For years,  we enriched Wolfgang Puck and Joaquin Splichal and now we are being bested by San Francisco.  This is a city that can't even launch a robot use of force program.  

Though, why Asanebo who has tasted the mighty french tire-bump, couldn't put an effing bottle of white wine in the flidgelator, is anybody's guess. I blame Clooney.  

The Michelin numbers are grim, but suffice it to say that now is the time to put our differences behind us and set out to be the most fussed-over city for rich people with appetites and tons of exposable income. Disposable income.  

Right, disposable income, exposable politicians, like Gavin Newsom and the French Laundry...episode. 

In fact, let's put some of the state surplus money into this initiative.  Food insecurity, for rich people... not instead of the programs for legitimately hungry people, who worry about their next meal, in addition too! 

Look, Jonathan Gold the legendary and now-deceased LA Times food critic did not die in vain.  He stuffed his damn arteries for decades so that we could be nearly as self-obsessed and competitive about the fancy food as any other stratified city in the nation: New York, SF, Miami!  

Dinner in Los Angeles should be among the finest most expensive experiences in the world, at any price!  If you have to ask, see Curren D. Price. 

Public:  What? No, we don't want a 900-seat restaurant and bar. We want nine seats with a two-year lead time for a reservation!  

Behested contributions, could knock a year off that, and get you in for a pre-game Prix fix, of $1,100 a head.  

Why don't we insist that fancy restaurants produce a percentage of their meals, that are very,  'affordable.'   

Uplifting:

Archie's favorite song is Benny and the Jetts and Brittney Griner is finally coming home.  Thank god. 

A  two-time gold medalist cannot be left behind over the holidays. Paul Whelan... "Shut up, Mr. Preven, it's holiday time."   

We did give the Russians the arms trader , known as the Merchant of Death, for Griner, but the Russians still wouldn't give back Whelan.   

Maybe we can up the ante and offer them some overstock from City Council and dare I say, our stalled ambassador program could be redeployed.

Or, if there is any interest in a Garcetti Goes To Russia episode... 

Since the separation incentive program may need some tuning up. It's the generous buyout program that helped hollow out city hall so that the hiring fiasco is a no-brainer for, 2023 headlines, colleagues.  

Over at the county board of supervisors, the parks and recs needs assessment plus was on Tuesday's agenda. Many city and county programs are being given a 'plus' to show that more resources are being added.  

Introducing, SIP plus!   

On offer, we have one MRT, one KDL, and a Nury already boxed up and ready for pickup.   It’s not Siberia but Mike Bonin said, he had some of the  "Greatest moments of my life in this building, and I've had some of the most horrific." 

Three Thumb Krekorian:

It's time to stop paying double or triple for the same bad service.   

Why, this year, for instance, have we been paying a $229,000 salary to Heather Hutt and or Herb Wesson but not Mark Ridley-Thomas?   

Until now. Now we're on the hook for two salaries and another $100,000 for MRT's attorney.  

Who the hell is handling these legal matters?   

Round of applause for, Mike Feuer.  A legacy of corruption.  

Round of applause for, Paul Krekorian.  

Where was Krekorian, the great legal scholar who allowed his license to lapse, when all these dumb Wesson-style interpretations of the law were being paid out? We paid out two CMs for a year.  Now we are clearly going to owe Jose. Huizar, money.  It’s a copy-paste. 

Krekorian was both Wesson and Nury’s top consiglieri.  They both sent him in to do the dirty work on the Budget and Finance Committee and also the Claims board, thereby eliminating a vital check and balance, on the Budget Chair. 

For those who remember, the mayor, the city attorney, and the council president "send in a clown to give the thumbs up or down” on nasty legal matters.  

Why send in fresh eyes, if you can just send in a third Krekorian thumb? 

At City Hall, three thumbs are better than two fresh eyes.  

Mayoral Speech Deadline: 

Sometimes, it's appropriate to take a so-called turf-terminator and turn it into a tiara. For those who don't recall, it was a company that was a lovely company prominently touted in Mayor Garcetti's 2017 inauguration speech, which turned out to be private equity Dbags, as I recall.  

Get your orders in early if you want to be mentioned in Karen Bass’s Mayoral speech.   

The Turf-Terminator scam was exposed by CBS’s David Goldstein, after the fact.   

Hopefully, he's still kicking over there.  Several times, but one time in particular, I offered him access to shocking records related to the so-called rat infestation at City Hall. Ultimately, someone at the big helpful network got cold feet so I was forced to punt and took the story to the people. 

Sort of. Via Dakota Smith who capably deflavorized it, and then John and Ken, for a final mean-spirited round of disgust with City Hall.  My takeaway is, “Why don’t we provide public restrooms?”.    

In any case, this week, Orkin is signing a big contract with LAX, LAWA.  

Kudos to Jill Stewart, who moved to Daily News recently, but gets credit in my mind, at least, for the inflatable rat associated with Measure S, that she spearheaded… to defeat.  

At the County,  American Golf is back at it, trying to establish a better foothold.  I will have to do the math, but they are very close to a monopoly.   

And so, Kudos to the lobbyists at Englander Knabe & Allen for getting the sneaky heist of more golf courses on the agenda, the very same day that Janice Hahn proclaimed, "Unlimited Public Comment... for all.” 

What a canny and magnificent opportunity to bury any comments on golf or anything, frankly, deep in a massive pile of comments. 

This is why so much respect and concern...  

Note to the Chairs:  

We love you, and a billion thank yous, but…how about a hearing on how to do public comment?  We can partner up City of Los Angeles and the County to work toward a countywide requirement!  Anna Aroutanian, who worked for Hahn briefly, can lead the joint powers task force. Like a Sunshine Ordinance. 

At present, we are moving ahead with two very divergent rules in the city and county and consequently two very different narratives. 

At the city, Paul Krekorian has been making it seem as if the protestors from the public are simply barbaric, not only do we need to protect the real public speakers, like Edgar Khalatian, a lobbyist for many big moneyed interests including Millenium and Harvard Westlake, who was downtown to deliver a crafty sermon on Tuesday, we need to engage with protestors. 

Krekorian adores Khalatian, as does Garcetti, who put him in an elite planning group. Garcetti also stuffed Ben Besley, an old college chum from Midwood, on the Housing Authority commission for two terms, from 2014 to April 29, 2021. 

It’s the OTHER people who are so — here are some of the disruptions from this week:  See, The Bustle of City Hall. 

The Bustle of City Hall:
One speaker said, “So, happy about all the density, but nobody can move own Wilcox. And Millennium on Sunset handing out free passes to the metro, “that’s delusional” …t 

Interesting to see the Third Amendment to Agreement No. 19-3675 with AlvaradoSmith, tucked in there, extending the term of the Agreement by three years, for ongoing litigation support.  

And how nice, as MRT is being paid off, that Vanir and Simpson + Simpson are up in there. 

Vanir joined the AECOM party bilking the county for millions on Men’s Central Jail advisories. 

Nithya Raman is a good speaker and said that it took 58 months in the past and we are cutting the time it takes to get affordable housing approved,  by 12 months.  And it’s going to require hiring 45 positions! Yay. 

Also, we’ll get a report from LADWP… so, maybe Matt Hale from Krekorian’s office, now Government affairs at DWP, will assist! Though, sadly, despite high IQ, he failed to produce Bass and Caruso’s water bills. 

Paul Koretz said, that without the careful forethought and planning… of Krekorian, O’Farrell… and the incredible leadership of Raman… please add Garcetti’s amazing sustainability team, Harris-Dawson for moving this efficiently through PLUM.  Giant push to get this here today. Katy Yaroslavsky and others will get it right…With oil drilling ban Friday, and styrofoam… represent a historic hatric of climate change … 

He said, we’ve done an enormous amount of greenhouse gas reduction in just one week and thanked, ”Andy Schrader, who was integral for laying the groundwork.” 

Curren D. Price called it a landmark piece of legislation, and then, they all voted, 12 ayes. 

“Please sit down and be silent, she’s not complying with my order, please remove her. With the orange or pink mask. She is causing an actual disruption.” 

After 45 years in the business Koretz finally wanted the amendment and main motion clarified.. 

The claims board recommended a settlement, the city attorne— 

“Here goes the cowbell.” 

Fauble: “what a surprise.”  

“Everyone has to wait for one person with a cowbell who is being escorted to the door, and she’s riding that cowbell again..” 

239 were watching which is five times more than the county board. fab five… 

“A handful behaving intolerably. We are doing the best we can… and of course, we have people who have come down here and are also being delayed.   

Fauble: “Still, shouting and ringing the cowbell, it’s quite loud in the chamber.”   

She’s shouting,”I’ll be back” so I guess she is going to be back.  

“Let me be clear, we will proceed, and continue to do the work of all the people of Los Angeles. 

“Sir, a substitute for item 35 —“ 

OK read it into the record. 

June 1 2022… enhanced maintenance… delete summer night lights, add’l staffing from rec 302-8972 youth program $500,000

To the brotherhood crusade, add the following for summer lights. $500,000 to general city purposes fund… CD 8 for Los Angeles Brotherhood Crusade. Bonin, seconds. 

We’ll take that up after public comment.  

Over three hundred and sixty thousand dollars were paid out to Mark Ridley Thomas and his lawyers. And more than $1.3M to Kathy Simpson, for her FEHA claims against the city  (Item 43). 

Blumenfield jumped up during the fusillade of environmentally conscious ordinances that were shoved through as quickly as possible to ensure Koretz and O’Farrell will be completely satisfied following years of work in committee.  

Bob wanted to be sure that before we require restaurants to take a plate that a customer brings in from home… a reusable household personal item, we need to do a feasibility study.  If you bring your own knife and fork… it’s the toilet seat covers. ..” 

O’Farrell… “I thought we were going to avoid that discussion, here? 

Once again, Mitch O’Farrell, pointed out that LA is leading to zero waste with policies in the city. 

Each initiative is a milestone toward ending toxic pollution… of our bodies, as part of the food chain. 

Paul Krekorian reminded us that people used to smoke in bars, but thanks to laws, and yes, infringement on our rights, not anymore.”

 “And yes, people bitched.  And that’s the kind of legacy… that all your work will leave.”  

Then he claimed, an amount of plastic equivalent approximately to a  credit card goes through a person’s body, each week. 

Let’s open the roll, close the roll… and FACT CHECK that.  It must be a longer period than a week.  My guess, a year. 

Next, item 30 Bonin… made the tough choice, to urge a no vote — we shouldn’t be deciding today, hydrogen is terrific, but the proposal is a problem. He said it’s an $800 million price tag, which means over one billion.  We need more info and too many risks. 

Krekorian call LADWP up to the table and eventually shoved it on through.  

“This is a baby step on a long journey… getting answers at every stage of the process.” 

Shining that mirror into the eyes of the council members.”  “It does not require discussion, you are ordered removed… “ 

Fauble:  “By the way, she’s still flashing the mirror in my eyes.” 

“And now she’s pulled out the cowbell… “   

Garcetti Examiner:

Larry Mantel couldn't resist one more arrivederci for Eric Garcetti and brought Alissa Walker, Dakota Smith, and Manuel Pastor on to give their thoughts.   The real goodbyes... were coming out of the chambers.  

On Tuesday, Joe Buscaino of CD15 got a robust send-off with a very good video. 

And on Wednesday, Mike Bonin of CD11 was lovingly roasted...in a loving way. There were more than 12 ayes that Bonin can be a pain in the ass.   

He claimed that he is fully aware of it, it’s part of his shtick.  

The man’s heart appeared to be in the right place, but he once introduced earplugs in his transportation committee, to signal there was no need to listen to the public.  In a city, that struggles with absurd pernicious, and pay-to-play series of failed policies of zero vision and exclusionary preferential parking districts.    

"Sir, it's his last day..." 

Bonin spoke for a long time, boosting Sheila Kuehl, who will be remembered as the shortest Supervisor in recent memory. Yes, for the box that she drags around, of course, but also for her yeoman duty shortening public comment across the county. Hard not to remember her bold failed effort at SCAQMD. 

Sheila whittled it all down to the bare minimum while expanding opportunities to hear herself and her colleagues bellow on without limitations.   

All Hail Queen Hahn, the Good One has risen. 

City Slickers:

I don't think people realize what an enormous effort was made to push through various shards of eco-friendly legislation that will help ensure the legacy of outgoing Pau Koretz, Mitchell O’Farrell, etc. 

O’Farrell and Koretz have been working like bunnies, in their last hours on the inside,  

Soon, they will be on the outside. Maybe getting paid more. Lol, not funny. 

What are they going to do, before they start lobbying as Greig Smith did?  It is a great question.  

Mike Bonin, will spend some time with his family.   Koretz is going to take some time with his family. O'Farrell is going to take some time with his family while advocating for youth diving. 

And Joe Buscaino should start a talk show, maybe he could replace Elex Michaelson who could run for office... JK. 

What about Mr. Deleon and his family...? 

“Sir, you're disrupting the meeting.” 

What about MRT and his family?  And Ms. Hutt and her family?  And Mr. Galperin and his family...? 

These are the brave first responders who caused the city to incur a $99,000 dollar legal bill, which is a lot, similar to what my little crook took for helping me dress down the city in appellate court.  

Paul Boylan.  Deeply unethical man who followed my instructions to the appellate court where we won big. His naughty behavior included signing a settlement FOR ME without even showing me the sneaky document to expedite his $95,000 tk.   

I examined filing a State Bar claim and went down and gave a blistering public comment to the Bar, but never filed a grievance because I didn't want to waste my time.   

Hump Day:

“Sir, you are ordered excluded from the meeting.” 

“Mr. Leonardo, you’ve been ordered removed.” 

“Everyone else who is using noisemakers and clapping is ordered to be silent. Leave this meeting immediately.” 

“There is a person using a noisemaker after being warned to be silent. Rule 12 applies to you and you are subject to council rule 7.” 

Fauble: “The gentleman in the black sweat suit with a burgundy pack on the front… you‘ve been ordered removed.”  [Also, where did you get that cute backpack? ttyl] 

“This is being delayed by a handful of people, we are going to deal with it because it is actively disrupting the city council” 

Fauble: “The gentleman with the noisemaker is making a great deal of noise we can’t possibly continue with that. And he’s moving very slowly backward as he shouts and uses the noise maker. He’s continuing. 

“The gentleman, you are not complying with my order… “ 

Fauble:  “The gentleman in the red shirt, black cap.” [Did you order that cap on Amazon?]  

“There will be no disruptions … Sir, please leave this meeting." 

Fauble:  He’s still shouting.  

“Apologies to everybody else who is waiting to give public comment." 

“The two women on my left are … engaged in responsive chanting… the same ones who were removed yesterday.” 

Fauble: “The woman in pink with the white face mask.  

“She’s been warned in every meeting over the last month…” 

Fauble: “Yes, she has.” 

“She’s shouting as she walks back” 

Fauble:  "We’re being delayed by the woman continuing to shout. Apologies to the public.  

Now, let’s continue item 11 for Bob Blumenfield… “we'll take it up in January after the community’s had a chance” to meet slash reload their opposition. 

Also, the person in the black shirt… all three in the aisle… leave the meeting immediately and silently, they’re not complying with my orders, sergeants please remove them.  

Black, pink, and light gray top and lite mask are being escorted out of the chambers per the President’s order. 

Municipal Monopoly:

“The Public is important they tell us about what’s going on,” said Chair Woman Janice Hahn.  

It was nice to recognize the Tongva, the Serrano… and the Chumash 

And Supervisor Horvath was nominated to be,  Chair Pro-temp. 

IDEA: Could we issue a contract, sole source, to examine the data on public frustration during the meetings?  

I propose a small sample, so a pilot at first, and we can do it by opening a small chat room and inviting certain members of the public, including puppets who praise and even one or two first amendment puppets.  This would provide the chair with real-time adjustments.  

Anyway, we iced the: Memorandum of Understanding with The University of Southern California

Not sure why. 

We raised the Wages of In-Home Supportive Services for Home Care Workers. Only $17? Slap in the face, they wanted $20 

And the DAILY DOUBLE, item 44, American Golf moved to grab more golf courses, for $71 million dollars over 15 years.  

Can you say Municipal Monopoly?

 

(Eric Preven is a longtime community activist and is a contributor to CityWatch. The opinions expressed by Eric Preven are solely his and not the opinions of CityWatch)