Tue, Jul

Some Good Christians Are Anything But


WON’T BE SILENT - What happened in Louisiana—legalizing the Ten Commandments to prominently be displayed in classrooms—is just the tip of the iceberg for what Mike Johnson—Speaker of the House of Representatives and Louisiana’s Congressman—views as his Christian doctrine doody…I mean duty. Mikey is hell-bent on upholding the teachings of Jesus Christ and implementing them in every crevice of our government. He’s rehearsing in his own state. Let’s not forget the pact he made with his son to keep an eye on each other whenever they wanted to whack off to porn. Odd as that sounds, you get the drift. It’s nuts, hands down. Literally and figuratively.

Mind you, the Ten Commandments is a Jewish thing because it was Moses who schlepped up the mountain to chat with a Burning Bush, and back down with those heavy stones, to the horror of seeing a tribe load of MAGA-like lunatics worshiping a Golden Calf. Let’s face it, the Ten Commandments have not been upheld all that well. Just watch the news.

For close to a year, I have been warning anyone who would listen about Project 2025, the Goyish answer to all the ills of America and its “crippling”, liberal ways. The media is hyper-focused on Trump—24 hours a day. Now the big question is, who will he choose as his Vice-Presidential running mate that he will treat like “The Little Mrs. (Née Mike Pence.) It’s nauseating to watch a handful of idiotic MAGA men acting like Miss America contestant hopefuls. Guess we can call this new non-beauty pageant, Mr. MAGA. How sad and desperate are these schnooks yearning to be hand-picked by their Führer and walk down the aisle to him. Music sways, the iconic tune…

“There he is, Mr. MAGA”. 

Can you just see & hear it? The ultimate acknowledgment and thrill is getting to do the double-fisted, hand-job dance with their orange daddy to the tune of “YMCA”. Maybe they can move the Inauguration to Atlantic City. What planet are we living on?

The one person that has not been mentioned for Mr. MAGA 2024 by the media—but has only by ME—is Mr. Louisiana, Mike Johnson. He would be the best candidate because he’s the Heritage Foundation butt boy for all things Christian Nationalism. Whoever ends up with that gig will be required to bring America back to the Dark Ages and who better than Mikey? Hmmm, maybe Tom Cotton. I’ll admit, I am as eager to see who steps out from behind the curtain as I was when Hillary Clinton announced Tim Caine. OY!!! The optics of it all. I immediately called my sister Vivian and we both agreed, “She’s gonna lose.” Then he started talking 'white man Spanish’ and I was truly crestfallen. All that “Hope and Change” down the toilet.

Since I am not a betting man, I won’t hedge my bets as to who will win in November. I will stay true to my belief as a One-Issue Voter, which is “Democracy Uber Alles.” And as for all those Gen Z for Change hypocrites who spew anti-Israel hate all day, perhaps they’d be best served voting for the Environment as their one issue, the way they used to crow about. That is, if they plan to live on Earth long enough to be my age, which is no spring chicken.


(ABE GURKO is the executive producer of a documentary “Won’t Be Silent,” about the extraordinary Women of Protest Music. He's an Opinionator who hosts a podcast, "Conversations From the Edge of Democracy," that discusses the current state of our fragile political landscape. Abe is a contributor to CityWatchLA.com[email protected]) PS…If you think I’m funny, you’ll love my book, “Won’t Be Silent - Don’t Stop ‘til It Matters, available on Amazon and Audible.