28
Thu, Mar

Prince Harry Wedding: No Invite for the Trumpster

SAY WHAT?


#1. President Trump has not received an invitation to Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's wedding. Meghan, a critic of Trump, backed Hillary and said she would leave the country if Trump was elected. It appears she is the only actress who said she would leave and did, leaving for England nabbing prince Harry. So, future princess, Trump's election sure is workin' for you.

#2.  Last weekend there was a massive brawl in a New Jersey Denny's with eggs, chairs and dishes flying. Sources say the whole melee started when a diner, with major anger issues, jumped up, throwing his plate and yelling, "I ordered eggs over easy. Are these eggs over easy? I think NOT!!!" Others with botched orders or, more likely just for fun, joined in.



#3.  Thanks to North Korea and Iran,The Doomsday Clock has moved up 30 seconds closer to midnight when global nuclear war will end it all.

Maybe it's time to bring back "duck and cover"* Since 2007, climate change was added to the clock. Perhaps the climate change warriors could add a few seconds by dropping the private jets and flying commercial.

*If you don't know what "duck and cover' is, ask an older person.

#4. On a Norwegian flight the toilets stopped working and had to return to the airport. There were 85 plumbers on board. They must have been going to a plumbers convention or a really monumental overflow and blockage somewhere. You'd think one or two,  just in case, might have packed a plunger in their carry on and could have fixed the problem. It turns out the toilets could only be fixed outside the plane.   

#4. A recent article suggests that there is too much apologizing today. The perpetually offended are always demanding an apology and usually receiving one. The writer suggests instead of caving in with the usual insincere "If what I said offended anyone, I am deeply sorry" say, "If I offended anyone, I deeply don't care." However, if what you said was factually wrong, then you should say, "Sorry about that."

 

-cw