My Corona—a Poem

LOS ANGELES

ALPERN AT LARGE--(Sung to the tune of “My Sharona” by The Knack, with apologies to Berton Averre and the late Doug Fieger—I’m under the delusion that I have a knack for this sort of thing) 

 

Ooh my little Democrat, or Republican,

Will that virus ever run its time: Corona!

Or will we see a plan get done, a plan get done.

Meanwhile that viral toll will climb: Corona!

 

Cleaning cannot stop, get a mop, don’t forget Clorox

‘Cuz this will mutate soon, to Ebola, or Smallpox!

Ai-ai-ai-ai! Oh NO!

M-m-m-my Corona!

 

Get a little farther, now, oh pretty please!

Far enough so I don’t inhale…Corona!

Don’t you dare to cough, or to sneeze!

Speak to me in text or e-mail…Corona!

 

Cleaning cannot stop, get a mop, don’t forget Clorox

‘Cuz this will mutate soon, to Ebola, or Smallpox!

Ai-ai-ai-ai! Oh NO!

M-m-m-my Corona!

 

When you gonna give to me, to me from thee,

Is it just a matter of time, Corona?

Boss sad cuz’ I so absentee, can’t disagree.

Demoted now to working part-time, Corona!

 

<<Insert your own heavy/anxious breathing, for the right effect, if you so desire>>

 

Cleaning cannot stop, get a mop, don’t forget Clorox

‘Cuz this will mutate soon, to Ebola, or Smallpox!

Ai-ai-ai-ai! Oh NO!

M-m-m-my Corona!

 

Oooooo-ohhh! Flee to Aaaaarizona?

Oooooo-ohhh! Or maybe Baaaaaarcelona?

Oooooo-ohhh! My Lord, it’s on myyyyy persona!

 

 

(CityWatch Columnist, Kenneth S. Alpern, M.D, is a dermatologist who has served in clinics in Los Angeles, Orange, and Riverside Counties, and is a proud husband and father to two cherished children and a wonderful wife. He was (termed out) also a Westside Village Zone Director and Board member of the Mar Vista Community Council (MVCC), previously co-chaired its Outreach Committee, and currently is Co-Chair of its MVCC Transportation/Infrastructure Committee and Vice-Chair of its Planning Committee. He was co-chair of the CD11 Transportation Advisory Committee and chaired the nonprofit Transit Coalition and can be reached at [email protected]. He also co-chairs the grassroots Friends of the Green Line at www.fogl.us. The views expressed in this article are solely those of Dr. Alpern.)

-cw